The full conversation
Heavy is the head.
- How does it feel to be champion?
- Exactly how I expected it to feel. Heavy is the head that wears the crown, but thankfully I’ve got the neck strength for it.
- What was the secret to last season’s success?
- Preparation, instinct and knowing exactly which “experts” to listen to after they’d already done all the hard work.
- Did luck play a part?
- Apparently so. Funny how luck kept happening to me and not to them.
- Were you ever worried someone would catch you?
- Catch me? They were too busy making their own decisions. That was their first mistake.
- How are you preparing for the new season?
- Same as any elite manager: AI analysis, several premium YouTube subscriptions and absolutely no original thoughts before the deadline.
- So you rely heavily on experts?
- I prefer to say I operate a highly sophisticated advisory network. Some of them just happen to have ring lights and affiliate links.
- Would you recommend people enter the league this season?
- Absolutely. A champion needs challengers. Preferably ones who still think “going with your gut” is a strategy.
- Is there anyone you see as a serious threat this year?
- I’ve reviewed the competition thoroughly. I’m confident the biggest danger remains an unexpected Wi-Fi outage at 10:55 on deadline day.
- Any advice for new managers?
- Never panic. Never chase last week’s points. And if your AI, three YouTubers and a bloke with 180,000 subscribers all agree on the same captain, call it instinct.
- Can anyone stop you retaining the title?
- Of course. Theoretically. That is what keeps the competition legally classified as a competition.